коллекция ParentControls содержит  0 -м элементом хозяина, затем идут "детки":

Private Sub PropertyPage_SelectionChanged()
Dim UC As MultySTD
Dim X As Object
Set UC = SelectedControls( 0 )
''сначала просто загрузили комбешники
For Each X In UC.Parent1.Controls
    If TypeName(X) = "CommandButton" Then
        cbAddAll.AddItem (X.Name)
        cbAddOne.AddItem (X.Name)
        cbDelAll.AddItem (X.Name)
        cbDelOne.AddItem (X.Name)
    End If
    If TypeName(X) = "FlexGridST" Then
        cbTop.AddItem (X.Name)
        cbLeft.AddItem (X.Name)
        cbRight.AddItem (X.Name)
    End If
Next
''теперь отпозиционировали их
Dim Name1 As String, i As Integer
For i =  0  To cbAddAll.ListCount -  1 
    If cbAddAll.List(i) = "btAddAll" Then cbAddAll.ListIndex = i
Next
For i =  0  To cbAddOne.ListCount -  1 
    If cbAddOne.List(i) = "btAddOne" Then cbAddOne.ListIndex = i
Next
For i =  0  To cbDelAll.ListCount -  1 
    If cbDelAll.List(i) = "btDelAll" Then cbDelAll.ListIndex = i
Next
For i =  0  To cbDelOne.ListCount -  1 
    If cbDelOne.List(i) = "btDelOne" Then cbDelOne.ListIndex = i
Next
For i =  0  To cbTop.ListCount -  1 
    If cbTop.List(i) = "grTop" Then cbTop.ListIndex = i
Next
For i =  0  To cbLeft.ListCount -  1 
    If cbLeft.List(i) = "grLeft" Then cbLeft.ListIndex = i
Next
For i =  0  To cbAddAll.ListCount -  1 
    If cbRight.List(i) = "grRight" Then cbRight.ListIndex = i
Next
End Sub

Private Sub cbAddAll_Click()
Changed = True
End Sub
Private Sub cbAddOne_Click()
Changed = True
End Sub
Private Sub cbDelAll_Click()
Changed = True
End Sub
Private Sub cbDelOne_Click()
Changed = True
End Sub
Private Sub cbLeft_Click()
Changed = True
End Sub
Private Sub cbRight_Click()
Changed = True
End Sub
Private Sub cbTop_Click()
Changed = True
End Sub

''теперь выбор юзера вписали в контрол
Private Sub PropertyPage_ApplyChanges()
SelectedControls( 0 ).btAddAll_Name = cbAddAll.Text
SelectedControls( 0 ).btAddOne_Name = cbAddOne.Text
SelectedControls( 0 ).btDelAll_Name = cbDelAll.Text
SelectedControls( 0 ).btDelOne_Name = cbDelOne.Text
SelectedControls( 0 ).grTop_Name = cbTop.Text
SelectedControls( 0 ).grLeft_Name = cbLeft.Text
SelectedControls( 0 ).grRight_Name = cbRight.Text
End Sub

Dim AddAll_Name As String
Dim AddOne_Name As String
Dim DelAll_Name As String
Dim DelOne_Name As String
Dim Top_Name As String
Dim Left_Name As String
Dim Right_Name As String

''это свойство позволяет в PropertyPage получить ссылку на форму-контейнер
Public Property Get Parent1() As Object
 Set Parent1 = UserControl.ParentControls( 0 )
End Property

''в эти свойства PropertyPage сохраняет настройки контрола выбранные в Дизайн-тайме
Public Property Let btAddAll_Name(X As String)
AddAll_Name = X
End Property
Public Property Let btAddOne_Name(X As String)
AddOne_Name = X
End Property
Public Property Let btDelAll_Name(X As String)
DelAll_Name = X
End Property
Public Property Let btDelOne_Name(X As String)
DelOne_Name = X
End Property
Public Property Let grTop_Name(X As String)
Top_Name = X
End Property
Public Property Let grLeft_Name(X As String)
Left_Name = X
End Property
Public Property Let grRight_Name(X As String)
Right_Name = X
End Property
Public Property Get btAddAll_Name() As String
btAddAll_Name = AddAll_Name
End Property
Public Property Get btAddOne_Name() As String
btAddOne_Name = AddOne_Name
End Property
Public Property Get btDelAll_Name() As String
btDelAll_Name = DelAll_Name
End Property
Public Property Get btDelOne_Name() As String
btDelOne_Name = DelOne_Name
End Property
Public Property Get grTop_Name() As String
grTop_Name = Top_Name
End Property
Public Property Get grLeft_Name() As String
grLeft_Name = Left_Name
End Property
Public Property Get grRight_Name() As String
grRight_Name = Right_Name
End Property

'в контроле в PropertyBag всегда после него идет UserControl_ReadProperties
Private Sub UserControl_Initialize()
Image1.Picture = IL1.ListImages("RED").Picture
End Sub

в ParentControls кроме формы ничего нет?

И второго вопроса не понял - почему удивительно?

Весь мир делится на две группы людей: на тех, кто недолюбливает Visual Basic, 
и на тех, кто жить без него не может. Вы почувствовали себя во второй группе?